I Am Me

young woman with pink hair sitting on aged car roof

( Intermediate Level )

“Isn’t it ironic how society or your family tells you how to act, what you should look like, or even what you should become but in the same breath they tell you to be a leader and not a follower?”

“Why can’t I just be me?” She had asked this question dozens of times to her teachers, her parents, or her boss at the burger shop where she worked part-time on weekends. Never once had she received a solid answer to this question?

“It is just how it is. People associate your looks with who you are. We know who you truly are but you are judged at first glance.” this was her mother’s go-to answer.

Those who really knew Shelby knew how smart, kind and honest she was. Others judge her without getting to know her. She felt this was unfortunate for them but it still bothers her. They were the ones who were missing out.

When she was out in any public setting, she tried not to draw attention to herself. It annoyed her but she would tell her friends, “It is what it is and I cannot change everyone’s mind.”

Shelby had a special relationship with her history teacher, Mr. Barkley. He would tell her there were many famous women in history who people thought were odd or silly but they turned out to be movers and shakers in the world. He always had a way of making her feel better.

See, what people didn’t know about Shelby she was in the top five percent of her class and she was in the running for class valedictorian. This honor is given to a student with the highest academic achievements.

Sometime this week or early next week it will be announced. The students had completed their last exams and those marks would be tallied to see who had won.

Shelby was home on Friday night surfing the internet on her laptop. She had finished all her homework earlier and really didn’t want to watch a movie with her parents. She made her rounds to all her favorite social media platforms, making comments or liking her friends’ posts.

Her last stop would be her emails before she showered and headed to bed. She noticed she had an email from her school and was curious.

She read, “Congratulations Shelby! We are proud to announce you are this year’s Valedictorian. You are expected to give the farewell address to the graduating seniors this year, so please prepare for this and allow us to review it before graduation.” It was signed by the principal of her school.

She took her laptop out to the living room where she knew her parents were. She could hear the television still on. “Mom, Dad, I have something for you to read.” She handed her laptop over to her mother.

Both her parents read the email at the same time and her mother squealed with delight. ” I am so very proud of you Honey. I know you’ve been working very hard all year long.”

Shelby headed back to her bedroom. She had showered and lay on her bed thinking of what she would say in her speech. She could be like all others in the past. Wishing everyone the best for their future but she wanted to speak from her heart.

She was up early the next morning and ate a quick bowl of oatmeal. She went to her desk to begin writing her speech. Shelby was old school when it came to writing. She used paper and a pencil.

She started many drafts but found she didn’t like how they sounded. She crumpled up pieces of paper all around the floor by the waste paper basket next to her desk.

Her mom knocked on her door lightly to see if she wanted breakfast with her and her dad. “No mom, I had some oatmeal already.” Her mom popped her head in the door about this time.

“Oh my, what happened here? It looks like a hurricane hit.” Shelby laughed and looked at her mom. “I am not having any luck with my speech. I don’t want to sound like a robot nor do I want to sound fake.”

“Don’t force it, Dear. The words will come to you,” She kissed Shelby’s forehead, picked up the crumpled papers that hadn’t made their way to the trash, then headed out to cook breakfast for her and her husband.

Her mom was right. Shelby took a break and went for a walk. This helped her clear her mind. She sat outside just watching people. Some who walked by her looked and then walked faster or they commented to those who walked with them.

That evening over dinner her mom asked her how the speech was going. “ I took a break. I will go back to writing again after dinner. I will have it done by Monday I am sure of this.”

After dinner, Shelby excused herself from the table. “If you need me, Mom, I will be in my room. I can help you with the dishes.” “No, It will be fine. You need to concentrate on that speech of yours.”

Shelby settled down at her desk and began to write and the words flowed through her pencil to the paper. her. She read it and reread it then shared it with her parents.

They felt she had spoken well and from the heart. She returned to her room and tucked it away until Monday when she would turn it in for approval.

On Monday afternoon the principal had called for her to come to the office. He handed back her speech to her and told her,” It was written eloquently and with great care. Great job!”

The week went by fast enough. Friday evening at seven the graduation commencement would be held on the sports field. Chairs would be set on the field and a small stage would go into place. Many of the seniors volunteered to help set up for the event.

Shelby and her parents had an early dinner on Friday night. After the ceremony, if they were hungry they could go out for dessert and coffee. For now, Shelby needed to get ready and arrive forty-five minutes earlier.

The evening was filled with excitement mixed with sadness. Some of her classmates will be going out of state to attend the college they chose. It was the end of one chapter and the start of a new one for all of them.

“Tonight we are here to celebrate our seniors. It is a time when they find out who they are and take the tools we have taught them and put them into good use. I wish all of them the very best. Without further ado let me introduce this year’s valedictorian, Shelby Mecham.”

You could hear her classmates say,” You go girl!” as the audience clapped. The bleachers were full of family members and friends of the graduating class. Shelby’s parents were on the top row hoping to have a better view.

Shelby stood there with confidence. She put her speech on the podium in front of her and adjusted the microphone.”Thank you all for coming tonight to celebrate with us.”

“As valedictorian, I can wish everyone the best in life and tell them they would be missed. They know they will. As much as we say we will keep in touch with one another our lives will drift apart.”

“During this time of our lives, we discovered who we are and what direction we will choose. Some of us will be wise in our choices and some of us will not.” She glanced around at her classmates and smiled, stopping at those who hadn’t taken high school as seriously.

“It is ok when we fail. We learn from our mistakes. Eventually, we will get it right. If not, we can always live with our parents for the rest of our lives.” She laughed along with the audience.

“If I can give all of you, my classmates and those in the audience, one bit of advice I would tell you not to judge anyone by how they look without getting to know them first.”

“My parents are the best in the world. They let me be me. I have pink hair this week and maybe next week I may have blue. I chose to have artwork on my arm. This is how I express myself. “

“Do these things make me a bad person? Do these things say I will be a bum in society? No, they don’t. They show I have the confidence to be who I want to be.”

“So, the next time you see someone who is like me don’t judge them, instead get to know them. I am standing up here on the stage tonight as this year’s valedictorian. If I was someone that was, in your eyes, a bad person, I would not even graduate. I am me.”

“Let’s get to the ceremony at hand. I know my fellow classmates want to get this chapter closed. Thank you again for coming.” As she ended her address everyone stood and clapped. Her classmates cheered. and whistled.

She glanced to the top row of the bleachers to see her parents smiling and clapping. Her dad blew her a kiss.

Written By: Angel

Follow Me On:

Instagram: morningangel847

Twitter: AngelOfTheMorn5

Meta Business Suite: Angel’s Thoughts to Pen

Coming soon: topenwithangel.com

Thoughts From Angel:

I am far from perfect. I am guilty of judging someone on their appearance or my first impression of them. I can say that most of us have at one time or another in our lifetime. I can tell you honestly I have been wrong on many occasions.

If you appreciate what I do “Buy Me A Coffee”

Vocabulary:

in the same breath – idiom: at the same time

associate – verb: connect (someone or something) with something else in one’s mind

go-to – adjective: a person or thing that may be relied on

unfortunate – adjective: bad fortune; unlucky

movers and shakers – idiom: a powerful person who initiates events and influences people

valedictorian – noun: typically having the highest academic achievements in the class

achievements – noun: a thing done successfully, typically by effort, courage, or skill

surfing the internet – (uncountable noun): to browse or move from site to site randomly

farewell address – noun: a speech delivered by someone upon leaving

squealed with delight – verb phrase: make a high-pitched sound when you become excited

old school – noun: something that is old-fashioned or traditional

drafts – noun: a preliminary version of a piece of writing

crumpled up – idiom: to crush a piece of paper until all of it is destroyed

fake – adjective: not real

flowed – verb: a steady stream

eloquently -adverb: persuasive manner

commencement – noun: a ceremony in which degrees or diplomas are given to graduating students

bleachers – noun: noun: a cheap bench seat at a sports arena

podium – noun: a small platform that a person uses to set their papers when giving a speech

Question ( s ):

Have you judged someone on their appearance or your first impression of them?

Were you wrong?

Who I See in The Mirror

girl in black and white polka dot sleeveless shirt

( Advanced Level )

Naomi was a straight – A student at school, an only child of upper – middle – class parents but when she looked in the mirror she didn’t like what she saw. She saw a girl who was unhappy.

The other girls at her school did not like her. They would tell others she was born with a silver spoon in her mouth and never had to go without. They hated her for this.

She asked, several times, “Why hold this against me? I didn’t choose my parents.” The only response was a resounding scoff as they walked away.

Naomi mainly kept to herself only going to school which she dreaded. She never attended any school activities. It was senseless to go anywhere in public where she would be made a laughing stock.

She purposely dressed down to ward off insults but it never worked. Maybe it was her hair or the way she carried herself at school. She didn’t know.

Naomi took down all her social media accounts. She found people commented very ugly things about her. It didn’t stop them, though. They used their own accounts, without naming her, to say awful things about this girl.

She knew exactly who they were talking about. Instead of ignoring all social media, she found herself searching each of the girl’s accounts. Each night ended with her in tears burying her face in her pillow.

Naomi never told her parents about the drama at school. She knew they were very busy with their work and this would be a trivial matter to them.

She could hear her mom now, ” Naomi, just hold your head up high and be yourself. They have to be jealous of you.” This was not what she wanted to hear. It is not as easy as that.

In order to go to a different school, her parents would have to move and her parents definitely would not entertain the thought of her being homeschooled.Children need to have socialization.” She could hear her parents now.

The school year pressed on and Naomi didn’t want to go to school anymore. She dreaded getting up each morning. She knew what each day would bring.

Stares. Laughs. Whispers. Not to forget the “Naomi, are you paying attention?” that came from her teachers. The whole situation was embarrassing for her.

She felt she couldn’t speak to the school authorities either. Her school had over four thousand students with one counselor. He wouldn’t have time for her.

The torment of the school year finally ended. Three whole months off from school. She hoped the new school year would bring a pleasant change.

Until then, she went to her grandparent’s home, in the countryside, for the summer. She went fishing with her grandfather and helped her grandmother bake fresh bread every day.

It was a perfect summer. Her troubles from school vanished from her daily thoughts. It wasn’t until she took the bus ride home and she drew closer to home that those nagging thoughts began to surface once again.

She was going to give the benefit of the doubt that this year would be better. Her mother picked her up from the bus station and on the ride home’ Naomi told her mom how each day was filled with new adventures while she was with her grandparents.

The following week her mom and she had planned to go school shopping. Paper, pencils, binders, backpack along with new clothes. The new school begins in one week.

Mom, the school clothes from last year are just fine. They are all in perfect condition.” She hoped wearing old school clothes would help her blend in better.

“Nonsense Naomi, no daughter of mine will wear last year’s school clothes this year. We will make a day of shopping and grab a bite at the food pavilion inside the mall.”

On that note, Naomi let out a huge sigh. Her mom would never understand. ” Sounds great mom.” One thing she knew about her mom was that she adores shopping and didn’t want to disappoint her.

The girl’s day out on their shopping excursion was exhausting but fun. They went in and out of store after store. They ate a small lunch since it was late in the day by the time they finished.

Naomi’s mom knew her husband would be disappointed if they didn’t sit down at their usual dinner time together. Having family dinners together was what he held dear to his heart.

After dinner, Naomi showed her dad all that they had bought that day and she then hung up all her clothes. Many of which she loved but deep down in her heart she knew something negative would be said to her once school started.

Naomi’s alarm clock started at six in the morning. Buzz. Buzz. Buzz. Naomi rubbed her eyes and turned it off. The day finally came. The first day of the new school year.

She hadn’t had a restful night. She tossed and turned for hours. ” Was this year going to be better?” she heard herself whisper more than once.

The first day, she felt, was bearable, or so she thought. Naomi wouldn’t realize until later that these girls hadn’t changed. She decided to avoid them at all costs.

She went to lunch later hoping they would be done eating and left the cafeteria. Unfortunately, some shared the same classes with her. There was no way to get out of seeing them.

The looks and whispers started but she pretended to be listening to what the teacher’s plans for the school year were. Taking imaginary notes but she knew. She knew.

Her mom picked her up from school knowing she would have tons of books for her new classes and school lockers would not be assigned until next week. “How was your first day of school, Sweetie?”

“It was okay. I was too busy getting information from all my teachers and classes to pay much attention to anything else.” It was a white lie. She was actually very busy but she was fully aware of those girls.

Her family ate dinner at the usual time. Dad talked about work and he asked how her first day of school was. Naomi began to tell him but her mom interrupted with something important to tell him so she never finished her conversation.

“Sorry dear, what were you saying?” as her dad looked at Naomi again. “It was great. May I be excused? I have to organize all my class folders.” Her mom nodded a yes and Naomi quietly left the dinner table.

Naomi showered and then gathered up all her school folders and her new binder out of her backpack. It was now time to get things in order.

She finished about an hour and a half later. Everything is put away in their appropriate designated folders. Finally, she neatly packed everything into her backpack, for the next day. She wasn’t quite tired enough to fall asleep so she decided to go on the internet for a while before bed.

When she was away with her grandparents she hadn’t any internet, then once she returned home life was so busy for her that she hadn’t the chance to look at social media or check her emails.

She sat there on her bed scrolling through the local news then navigated her way to all the social media applications she loved to check. Her heart jumped when she read a post regarding her.

There was a picture of her science class and the back of her head. Her name wasn’t used but the post was definitely about her.

“The prima donna is back. She sits here in class looking down at the rest of us. Raising her hand to ask the teacher questions just to draw attention to herself. Like she needs to get over herself.” the posting read.

This was far from the truth. Naomi didn’t want the attention. She wasn’t believing what she had read. Then she continued to read the comments written after this initial post.

“Yeah, I saw her in the hallway strutting around hoping all the boys would pay any mind to her.”

“Me too. I was hoping she wouldn’t return this year. So much for hoping.”

She closed the lid of her laptop and wiped away the tears. She could only imagine what others would comment on in the days to come.

Naomi took a deep breath and headed out to the living room. She was hoping to finally talk to her mom or even dad about everything. Maybe they would listen to her with proof.

She made her way down the hallway to the living room to find the TV on but her dad was sound asleep with a book on his chest. Her mom had already gone to bed. She turned off the TV and headed to her parent’s bedroom.

Mom? Mom, are you awake?” No response. Again, “Mom?” Still nothing. She quietly closed their door and headed back to her own bedroom.

As Naomi sat on her bed, in the dark, she whispered to herself,” I cannot do this again this year. I cannot.”

After ten minutes or so Naomi turned on her bedroom lights and sat at her desk. She began an email to her parents and to the school….

“I have taken a screenshot of what was posted of me on social media. This is not the first thing they’ve posted about me but I know it will be the last. I will not be their target any longer. I will not be here.”

“I do worry about my parents. They do not deserve this. I don’t believe they would truly understand how much this has hurt me.”

“You can do what you want with this information. If I can shed light and possibly help another girl or boy, it will be worth it. I sit here knowing I do not want another year of harassment and whispers.”

“Who I see in the mirror is who I am. A girl who loves her family. A girl who would never hurt another. I was judged by my clothes and my ambitions in life.”

“For those who never knew me really, it is your loss. For those who did, I am sorry. ” She ended her email and hit send.

Tragically, Naomi took her own life that night.

Written by: Angel

Follow me on:

Instagram: morningangel847

Twitter: AngelOfTheMorn5

Meta Business Suite: Angel’s Thoughts To Pen

Thoughts From Angel:

Bullying, in any form is wrong. You may think it is harmless but it is not. Words hurt. Put yourself in their shoes. How would you feel? Things being said about you that were completely false. The whispers….people talking. The stories changing from one person to the next. Stop and think before you say those hateful things to another.

For those on the receiving end of bullying, there are people who will listen. There are laws to protect you. Don’t be afraid to speak up.

If you appreciate what I do and want to support me:

Vocabulary:

silver spoon in (her) mouth – idiom: born into a wealthy family

resounding – adjective: sound loud enough to reverberate

scoff – verb: scornfully or mocking way

dreaded – adjective: apprehension

laughing stock – noun: a person subjected ridicule

dressed down – phrasal verb: dress informally

carried herself– idiom: pertains to grace, etiquette, speech, grooming, body language

ignoring – verb: refuse to take notice of or acknowledge

burying – verb: completely cover

drama – noun: unexpected series of events or set of circumstances

trivial – adjective: of little value or importance

jealous – adjective: envy of someone or their achievements and advantages

homeschooled – verb: educate (one’s child) at home instead of sending them to a school

pressed on – phrasal verb: move forward

authorities – noun : a person who has the power or right to give orders, make decisions, and enforce obedience

torment– noun: mental suffering or unhappiness

pleasant – adjective: giving a sense of satisfaction or enjoyment

vanished – verb: disappear completely

nagging – adjective: worrying

began to surface – verb: become known or obvious after being hidden

benefit of the doubt – idiom: the state of accepting something/someone as honest or deserving of trust even though there are doubts

blend in – phrasal verb: to look like things nearby

pavilion – noun: structured eating area inside a larger building

on that note -metaphor: to transition from that topic; anyway

adored – verb: loves

excursion – noun: a short trip

exhausting – adjective: very tiring

held dear to (his) heart – phrase: cares a lot about it

deep down in (her) heart – idiom: used to mean that something is true or real even if it is not said or shown to other people 

tossed and turned – idiom :to move about and turn over in bed because one is unable to sleep

bearable – adjective: able to be endured or handle

at all costs – idiom: regardless of the price to be paid or the effort needed

cafeteria – noun: a restaurant or dining room in a school

pretended – adjective: not genuine; assumed

imaginary – adjective: unreal, not true , fake

white lie – noun: a harmless lie told to avoid hurting someone’s feelings

interrupted – verb: to stop something from continuing

organize – verb: arrange into an order

designated – verb: assigned

navigated – verb: plan and direct the route or course 

prima donna – noun: a very temperamental person with an inflated view of their own importance

initial – adjective: beginning

strutting – adjective: arrogant or conceited walk

pay any mind – idiom: not give attention to or to ignore

shed light – idiom:  help to explain

tragically – adverb: extreme distress or sorrow

Question ( s ):

Do you believe Naomi should of tried to tell her parents earlier?

Do you think words, just words, can be harmful to another person?

How do you define bullying?